There comes a time for most of us when we decide that we can no longer keep on our homes, and rather than go into a care home, many of us decide to sell up, and move in with relatives. Some of us never have that opportunity of course, but for those of us that do, it is most important that this idea is fully thought through.

But before you do this, ask yourself some basic questions. To begin with, do you like the person you are moving in with, do you get on well with them? For if you don’t like them much now, you sure as heck won’t like them at all when you are spending all day, every day, in their company!

And there are other important matters to consider too; such as how will the living arrangements work? Will you have your own room, or even a small apartment within the greater house? Is the house you are moving to suitable for you, are there lots of stairs, or threatening dogs running wild? A big dog may be nice to meet once in a while, but would you really be happy with an aggressive hound, or two or three of them, snapping round your ankles all day?

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The same goes for boisterous children too. The grandkids may be great fun on high days and holidays, but young teenagers can be most demanding to live with right round the clock. Are you really ready for all that?

What about eating arrangements? Will you share, or cook and eat alone? And if you are sharing, will you be able to cope with the spicy and exotic foods that many younger people take for granted today, the same food that many of the older generation have never much liked? These are all important points to consider if you seek longer-term harmony within the household, and let’s face it, that is so important.

And perhaps most importantly of all, what will be the financial arrangements? Will you pay rent, or help to pay the household bills? Would you sell your home and make a sizeable contribution towards the cost of a newer larger home for you all? If you did that, who would own this new home? And of course the most important thing of all, if you found that you did not get on well and wanted to move out again, could you do so, and most importantly, could you get your money out again, to buy a new apartment for yourself?

Though it might be considered excessive, it is a good idea to have drawn up a legal agreement between both parties before you enter into any such arrangement. And if you do that, it is always prudent to spend a little money on pukka legal advice, so that you know that what is being said, and agreed, is actual fact. I’m sorry to say that verbal arrangements between family members over large amounts of cash can be easily forgotten within a short period of time.

One chap I knew took in his aging aunt. She was becoming a little confused and signed over all her affairs to him. Without her knowledge he then proceeded to sell her bungalow, and what’s more, invested all the money in his ailing second hand car business. A little while later the lady seemed a great deal better, and duly announced that she was well enough to return to her bungalow. You can imagine how upset she was when she discovered that she no longer owned her own home, nor had received any money from the sale proceeds, and all this business had been done quite legally without her knowledge.

If you are selling your own home and decide to move in with relatives, always think everything through most carefully. Have a legal agreement drawn up, and most importantly of all, make sure that you have an exit strategy in place, for you, and your funds, if you discover, perhaps to your absolute horror, that you really don’t get on with your relatives at all.

People who have lived alone or solely with their partner for twenty, thirty, forty years, are often the most unsuitable people to suddenly be thrust into the busy noisy environment of a crowded boisterous home. Could you really get to sleep at 10.30pm if your young nephew was carrying out his rock band practice, or playing loud music in the next room until midnight? Think about it long and hard, and have that agreement drawn up, it may seem hard hearted, but if you ever needed it, you still have some security. If you give all your assets and independence away, then what have you got left? In the case of a dispute, absolutely nothing, and that is too terrible a prospect to contemplate. If you are considering this course of action, why not go and stay with your family for a month’s holiday, or two? That will certainly go some way to reassuring yourself that everything will be well, but always keep your wits about you, and think most clearly about what might happen if you are unhappy there.

David Carter’s latest published work is SPLAM! Successful Property Letting And Management. Splam! contains over 240 pages of hints and tips on how to start your own property business on a limited budget, and how to successfully let residential property. You can view actual extracts of the book at http://www.splam.co.uk/ and order a download or a hard copy at this site or you can go direct to the publishers at http://www.lulu.com/dc. He also runs a holiday cottage website where you can access over 7,000 holiday cottages, apartments and villas worldwide at http://www.pebblebeachmedia.co.uk/. Don’t you deserve a holiday? Well of course you do! You can contact David on any matter any time at supalife@aol.com